James Thurber, one of the most popular humorists of the 20th century, offered these wise words about how best to live; “All human beings should try to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.”
Over a lifetime I admit running from a fear of not being or doing enough. As I grew a little wiser I am learning to accept who I am — strengths and weaknesses — because I understand the goal is to live a full and purposeful life.
It’s both amusing and enlightening for me after so many years of studying philosophy and teaching others that I should learn the most important lesson from a black and white feral cat who taught me how to live and die with courage and dignity,
The book about him and what I learned — “Mr. Tux Finds a Home” — has just been published. It’s the story of a wandering black and white cat who after many adventures finds his way home to a loving family.
Along the way the cat discovers some very important universal lessons about life: Never give up the quest for a spiritual home, stay curious along the way, be persistent in following your dream, and most important, when it comes time to die, be at peace with yourself and those you love.
Like politics and taxes, death is not a popular topic these days. We try to avoid talking about it, especially with children.
But I would suggest children have questions about death, based on their age. Early on, it comes simply as an absence, later with wonder about whether there is anything beyond death.
I remember losing a pet rabbit and feeling the loss for weeks. No one really acknowledged my feelings, and I probably did not feel comfortable talking about them, even as I witnessed my father, a minister, dealing with deaths as part of his vocation.
I also remember as a child telling a joke to my mother, who probably wondered where I got it. A young boy asked his mother what happened to him before he was born and after he died. My mother said that to dust we come and do dust we go, words she probably heard in a graveside ceremony. The boy then replied: “Well, I just looked under the bed, and someone is either coming or doing.” Perhaps this was my way of raising the issue.
I celebrate one cat, Mr. Tux, in my ninth and latest book, because he taught me not only how to live, but perhaps most importantly, how to die.
According to Plato, when asked to summarize the meaning of philosophy, Socrates reportedly said to practice dying. This may seem a strange, even somewhat morbid thought, but I would say that with birth, death is the most universal experience everyone goes through, and often one seldom openly discussed.
But I think what Socrates meant was to look at the obvious — life is as much letting go as holding on, to dying as to living.
So the book was intended for children (and adults of all ages) it comes with an understanding that children do think about death but adults don’t acknowledge this and seldom help them sort through these feelings. Hopefully Mr. Tux can help them as he did me.
One of my favorite poems is “Curiosity” by Scottish poet Alastair Reid in which he writes,
“Face it. Curiosity
will not cause us to die–
only lack of it will….
Only the curious
have, if they live, a tale
worth telling at all….
A cat minority of one
is all that can be counted on
to tell the truth. And what cats have to tell
on each return from hell
is this: that dying is what the living do,
that dying is what the loving do,…”
Mr. Tux’s truth was the most important of all about how to live and how to die — true to his life and a model to adopt about integrity, courage and dignity.
He’s gone but not out of mind. I don’t know if he has nine lives as some ancient mainly Egyptian myths note, but this one was enough for me to learn what’s most important.
I admit there are times I think he is sitting beside me on the couch or waiting on the table to be acknowledged. I sometimes imagined him suggesting what to write.
Strange, but on the first day his book became available, he came to me in a dream, walking toward my son and myself, as if grateful to be remembered and honored with a book with his name in the title.
John C. Morgan is an author and teacher. His ninth and latest book just out: “Mr. Tux Finds a Home,” Resource Publications, 2025, available now on Amazon or from the publisher.
